Mother-In-Law Stories
Worst Gift Archives
1/27/2001
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	Worst gift: I'm tired of being insulted when my MIL buys me dollar store trash bags, dish detergent, etc., when she gets my husband nice gifts.  Next Christmas I'm going to get her a can of deodorant to open up in front of the whole family! 1/20         signed - Looking Forward To Next Christmas RESPONSE:  Looking Forward To Next Christmas Don't you think it would be better to give her "feminine hygiene spray" instead of just deodorant? 1/21
	Worst gift: This wasn't a Christmas gift, but for my bridal shower, my MIL gave me "The Complete Idiot's Guide to Cooking." (DH is the chef of the family, by choice.)  I handled it well, not flinching or batting an eyelash, but inside I was in shock that she would voice her disapproval of me in front of MY family and friends.  Afterwards, my aunts and cousins came up to me and expressed their deepest condolences about the kind of MIL I was going to be inheriting through this marriage.  All it did was make HER look bad. 1/4         signed - My MIL Is The Real Idiot Here RESPONSE:  My MIL is the real idiot here My sympathy is with you!  I can relate, since I have received 2 such gems from my MIL:  "Cooking for Dummies" (nice title, huh?), and something along the lines of, "How to be an Organized Housewife".  Both were Christmas stocking stuffers.  I said, "Oh, this is just what I ALWAYS wanted" in an exaggerated tone, but the sarcasm was lost on her.  Well, not really, but you know what I mean.  At least she didn't whine, "I was only trying to be HELPFUL."  Actually, I liked the cookbook, I just didn't like the title.  The other book was one of those dippy "let's make fun, creative wastebaskets for every room in the house, and let's make 'fun' hampers for the clothes to make housework more entertaining -- and get your house cleaner!"  Ick.  Doesn't she realize I have a small child AND a full-time job (50 hrs./week)?  Apparently not.  She never gives my husband gifts like that.  She only nags him about the dust in our house.  At least she gets 1 point for not just considering cleaning MY job.  (She's a clean freak, so we take her criticism with a grain of salt.)  We both ignore her nagging and insist, "We think it's fine," until she realizes she's fighting a losing battle, then afterward she's pretty much normal and doesn't criticize anything.  Anyway, the next time MIL had a garage sale and asked for our contributions, guess what book ended up there?  She never mentioned it.  Hee hee. 1/6 RESPONSE:  My MIL is the real idiot here I got one of those dummy/idiot book before, too, and it was really insulting.  My MIL gave me "Internet for Idiots".  This was an ultimate insult, as my MIL knows so little about the topic.  My husband told her that he hated those books because of the titles, and she told him that he should relax, it's only humor.  Well, next Mother's Day, I gave her a "Cooking for Idiots" book for a "gag" gift, and it wasn't appreciated.  When my MIL actually had a nerve to say, "I love cook books, but I'm not sure this is something I'd need," my husband reminded her of the book she had given to me.  She did not have anything else to say. 1/8 RESPONSE:   Sweetheart, maybe she thought she was being helpful by getting an elementary book.  Those "Idiot" books are written for every subject and DO NOT MEAN you are an idiot.  I guess if you look for negativity you will find it everywhere.  I would have welcomed this gift. 1/8 RESPONSE From Poster:  I am the original poster.  This is to the person who referred to me as "sweetheart".  Because this was a worst gifts story, I did not go into the gory details of how my MIL has treated me since the day she met me.  She even went so far as to try to convince DH not to marry me.  Why?  Because I don't cook every night, and I am "shirking my wifely duties".  There's much, much more than that, too much to go into here.  Because of all she has done, DH has drastically limited contact with her. I know the "Idiot" and "Dummy" books are informative.  I have a couple for some computer programs I use.  I am not that overly sensitive.  But, this "gift" coming from my MIL was not well-meaning, or even joking, especially considering the history between us.  My friends and family do not read too much into things, and they, independently and without any prompting, made comments about it.  Must've been that smug little smile on her face as she watched me open it.  My original point was that I couldn't believe she would do that in front of my family and friends, and risk getting on the bad side of a group of people who obviously care very much about me. Coming from anyone else, I would've appreciated it, too.  Too bad I threw it away.  I could have sent it to you. Sweetheart, I don't have to look for negativity when it comes to my MIL.  It stares me in the face, whenever I am in her presence, which is thankfully not often.  The amazing thing is that I AM able to stay positive and upbeat despite her toxic presence in my life.  I credit my parents for that, who, by the way, have accepted my DH with open arms. I come here for support and to have a place to vent, so that I can stay positive the rest of the time.  Judging from the other responses, other people have received similar gifts.  It's nice to know we're not alone.  That is why I posted my story. 1/9 RESPONSE:  My MIL Is The Real Idiot Here Don't listen to the response from the condescending person calling you "Sweetheart".  It sounds like it was written by your MIL.  You are NOT looking for negativity by being insulted that your MIL basically called you an "idiot" with this book as a gift!  Nobody appreciates being called "dumb" - even if it is under the pretense of humor.  You have a right to feel insulted. 1/9 RESPONSE:  My MIL Is The Real Idiot Here Blow off the response to the person who suggested taking this as a compliment.  Dummies books are intended to be "Self-help" books.  I don't think it is good manners to give anyone a "dummies" book as a gift to anyone, unless there is some mutual agreement between the donor/recipient.  It was obvious from the OP the MIL had some animosity towards the woman before the gift was given.  Tacky and poor judgment.  I am glad there isn't a book called "Being a Good in Law For Dummies" ... 1/10 RESPONSE:  My Mil is the real idiot here Since my response didn't get printed, I decided to send it in again. (Editors Note: - We apologize.  Ran into issues here that have been corrected.) Ignore the response that begins with "Sweetheart." That person needs to get a life and she's probably a MIL!!  The book was a deliberate slam, in my opinion.  Here's what I'd do.  The next gift-giving occasion give your MIL "Etiquette for Dummies." She how she likes it!! Best of Luck to you!  1/10 RESPONSE:  My MIL is the Real Idiot Here Your MIL was trying to upset you, and she succeeded.  However, I think the best revenge would have been to use that book.  Maybe you'd find some recipes you liked, and maybe you and DH could cook dinner as a way of spending quality time together.  Then, say things to MIL like, "Oh, DH and I had the greatest meal last night.  Thank you for that book."  And if DH is around to agree, so much the better!  It would kill her to know that you are enjoying her "present", and it's bringing you and her precious son together!  In a situation like that, a positive spin would be most beneficial to you.  If you let every little dig and snide comment upset you, you're going to end up on medication or in an early grave.  Wouldn't your MIL love that!  Basically, I'm saying deal with the bigger issues, but don't sweat the small stuff. 1/11 RESPONSE:  My MIL Is The Real Idiot Here Proper etiquette dictates not to buy a "Dummies" book as a gift unless it was the specific request of the recipient.  Sounds like the MIL was trying to belittle the DIL in a roundabout way, since the OP noted some conflict in their relationship.  By MIL giving the OP this book, sends a subliminal message that she is lacking in culinary skills.  Good thing that stunt backfired on MIL big time. 1/12 RESPONSE:  My MIL Is The Real Idiot Here Don't sweat the small stuff??  How is receiving an Idiot's/Dummies book from your MIL something small?  I agree with most of the other responses that this original poster has a legitimate beef with her MIL on this one.  Besides "small stuff" adds up fast where Mils are concerned.  They love to get at you with "small stuff" like this.  It doesn't make it any less annoying.  I'm glad the original poster trashed the book!  It would just be a reminder of her MIL's hurtfulness. 1/14 RESPONSE:  My MIL Is The Real Idiot Here I agree.  It seems like with a lot of mil's, they'll commit only a few major nasty stunts.  Usually, it's just a lot of small stuff, pecking and pecking.  Little reminders of how subhuman she considers you to be. 1/22
	Worst gift: How about "poo" in a box?  NO, I'm serious.  Only I wasn't given it, my MIL had the honor.  Her son, my DH, was the one who gave it to her.  The funny part is that he thought it was the perfect gift for he,r and didn't understand why I thought it was so funny.  She loves cats and her garden, so he thought a "POO PET" was just the thing.  It's cow poop that is shaped like a cat.  You put it in your garden!!  What a scream (it really did come in a box - a cardboard one with "POO PET" in big letters.) 1/25         signed - Ha Ha Ha Ha Hee Hee RESPONSE:  Ha Ha Ha Ha Hee Hee It is true what they say: one man's trash is another man's treasure!  I remember the things that you are talking about & I loved them.  My mil loves to garden & has fantastic landscaping!  We gave her a poo critter with her Christmas gift one year.  We all sat around Christmas morning and laughed about how she was getting sh*t for Christmas, but we all thought it was a hoot.  They are meant to fertilize your beds.  I *think* my mil liked her gift. 1/26
	Worst gift: In my H family they drew names, and the SIL who got my name decided to give my H a gift instead.  So while we all took turns unwrapping our presents, he got two and I got none.  That gift will be recycled back to her in five years from Both of us with a big smile! 1/4         signed - My SIL Is A Thoughtless Witch RESPONSE:  Sister was a Thoughtless Witch Why wait five years to recycle the gift?  Just do it at the next opportunity.  Make sure your SIL knows that your DH is privy to her mean behavior towards you. 1/5 RESPONSE:  My SIL Is A Thoughtless Witch What a mean-spirited witch your SIL is!!!  I would have been furious!  1/5 RESPONSE:  My SIL is a thoughtless Witch!! I am curious if you questioned your SIL about how she had your name and bought your husband a gift?  Did your husband say, "Why are you giving me a gift when you were supposed to give one to my wife?"  That was very mean, and I would have had to say something.  How can people be like that?  It is so wrong! Signed - just felt bad for ya. 1/5 RESPONSE:  My SIL is a thoughtless witch Why wait five years?  I would recycle it back to her at the earliest opportunity, while it's still fresh in her mind. 1/5 RESPONSE:  My SIL is a thoughtless witch I agree.  Give it to her as soon as possible, with the big smile. 1/6 RESPONSE:  my sister in law is a thoughtless witch I agree!  Is your SIL getting married any time soon?  Give it to her at her bridal shower!! 1/8 RESPONSE:  My SIL is a thoughtless witch Something similar happened to me, although I have to tell you how I screwed up, too.  This will sound crazy, but, I came from a VERY poor family and it was typical of us to get each other secondhand gifts.  Usually, it was all that we could afford.  I honestly didn't realize how offensive this would be to people outside of my family (I know, kind of dimwitted of me), until my HUSBAND spelled it out for me.  People don't want used gifts, they want NEW gifts.  Duh!, I guess I WAS kind of born in a barn.  Anyway, our family exchanged names.  My brother was married by then, but I was still single.  I got my SIL's name and spent a lot of time lovingly collecting a lot of cookie-baking things.  These items included an antique cookie jar (that was actually pretty expensive and beautiful, but it was USED), and cookie cutters (again, used), etc.  I have the feeling that she was probably appalled by this gift, and probably got rid of it as quickly as she could.  But, she had drawn my name, too, and she hadn't bothered to get me anything.  She and my brother just ignored the name-drawing, and gave us each (my mother, father, and me) two or three tiny, identical trinkets.  I'm not a very materialistic person, but I was a little hurt by that.  I guess she was offended too.  I'm glad, to tell you the truth, that my SIL and I live on opposite sides of the country.  She's lovely, but we are the most incompatible people.  I DO give her better gifts now, though.  Thank God someone clued me in! 1/26
	Worst gift: Picture this - a beautiful outdoor Victorian garden wedding complete with lace, roses, a classical guitarist, ETC.  We had a lovely buffet table with salmon, steak, almond cake, petit fours, strawberries and cream, and all the lovely delicate Victorian sweets you could ever want.  As our wedding gift from the MIL (and she was serious, this was THE wedding gift she presented to us the night before), we received a very large glass jar filled with her homemade pickled eggs.  These weren't just any old pickled eggs though, she had colored them PINK!!!  Seeing as it was a special occasion and all, we were expected to display them, glass jar and all, on our elegant buffet table.  When we tried to place them out of the way on the bar, in a huff, she promptly moved them back, gave us an earful, and then left our wedding muttering how thoroughly ungrateful we were, and how she was never going to speak to us again (woo hoo ... oh, did I say that out loud? - so sorry).  We have been married 5 years now, and the Pink Pickled Eggs from Hell still reside in our basement.  We occasionally show them off to guests as one of the great freaks of nature - kind of like a three headed calf or a wingless chicken. 1/18         signed - Tickled Pink RESPONSE:  Pink Pickled Eggs Is your MIL Pennsylvania Dutch?  Believe it or not, pink pickled eggs (or, as they call them here, Red Beet Eggs) are standard fare in this neck of the woods.  But, if you didn't ask her to bring anything, and she was so rude about FORCING them to be on prominent display, then this is a little worse than just a humorous little misunderstanding.  She sounds difficult.  Even though I have to sheepishly admit that I LIKE Red Beet Eggs.  The other foods at your reception sound lovely, by the way. 1/26
	Worst gift: My husband got a chainsaw, because my FIL claims that DH is trying to, "destroy his tools."  The topic of "destruction" of FIL's tools should be over, right?  WRONG!!  If FIL felt so strongly about it, then why not keep the new chainsaw & give DH the "destroyed" one?????  (BTW, my husband is an excellent auto mechanic & has maintained over $20,000 worth of tools for the past 15 years without any problem.)  I received a bread maker.  Not a bad gift at all, & I'm very appreciative, but now I am expected to bake bread constantly.  They call me every day -- making more bread for us yet?  Hey guys -- CAN WE HAVE SOME TOO?  I ONLY MADE IT!! 1/3         signed - It's Xmas time in Hell RESPONSE:  It's Christmas time in Hell. This might not be a good idea, but if the requests keep coming for fresh baked bread any longer, I would be forced to do it.  I would write a nice Thank You card stating, "I really did love my new bread maker, and enjoyed using it, however I simply can not keep up with your requests for fresh baked bread, so I thought you could use it more than us."  Insert the card in the box with the bread maker and send it back to them in the mail.  That would shut her up real quick.  You would get some peace and quiet, I'm sure!!! 1/4 RESPONSE:  It's Xmas time in hell I would be glad to make bread for my in-laws - loaded with syrup of ipecac! 1/5 RESPONSE From Poster:  It's Xmas time in hell I gave her a stupid angel dinner bell & a stuffed snowman holding one of those wicker-type snow-brushes.  My SIL is a b*tch from h*ll.  I took a lot of time picking out a Southwestern-inspired spirit rock for her.  I guess she loved them until she did her 180 on us & started acting like a total freak on Xmas Eve -- she hated it!!  Oh well, scr*w her.  Scr*w all of them. 1/26 RESPONSE:  It's Xmas time in hell My in-laws gave me a breadmaker for Christmas, too.  I agree -- not a bad gift (although I never would have gotten one for myself), but they immediately began saying things like, "Now I bet you aren't even going to use it."  Of course, then I was forced to protest and say, "Oh, of course, I will!" -- but comments like that kind of ruined it.  They give you something you don't request or require, then give you a hard time about it.  (I have tried to use it at least to make bread for family occasions, so they can feel good about their gift -- and I DO think it was a nice gift -- if only they had given it with no strings.) 1/27
	Worst gift: My MIL is so cheap, even though she brags about how much money she has.   One Christmas, she gave me a box of chocolates, Brand X.   When we opened it, the chocolates smelled a little funny, and were bloomed (turned crusty white - means they've melted at least once).   My husband and I each bit one and spit it out.   The candies had gone BAAAAD.   The inset in the box said exchange or money back if not satisfied.   It just happened that Brand X candy was located in our neighborhood mall.   We took it down and explained that we got a bad batch and wanted anther box.   The manager looked at the packaging and asked us why we, "waited so long to exchange them."   When we told him we got it a few days earlier, he said in disgust, "According to our (encrypted) manufacturing code, this box of candies was made EIGHT YEARS AGO!!!!!" 1/24         signed - Never Eating MIL Chocolates Again!
	Worst gift: My MIL is very wealthy, but she is the cheapest person that I have ever met.  I got a cheap, polyester blouse that was USED (as noted by the obvious underarm stains and pilling of the fabric).  One year, I got a USED wallet.  The flap was dog-eared, the coin purse had circular impressions of coins, and the billfold was sticky (the way that cheap old vinyl gets), smelled of money, and it was a designer knockoff.  Another year, I got a belt with adhesive tape on the back holding a broken clasp.  The tape was the clear type (now old, yellow, and brittle).  Also, I received "five and dime" jewelry that was broken and tarnished. 1/24         signed - Red Faced And Mad
	Worst gift: My in-laws are growing vegetables professionally.  They are so incredibly cheap that they will bring vegetables (those that are supposed to grow straight) that haven't grown straight, but have curled, as a "present" to all family birthdays (usually one crooked vegetable per family member).  Mind you, these are vegetables that they can not sell, and would have been thrown away otherwise.  I wouldn't mind so much if they brought them as an "extra", because, apart from their unpopular shape, the vegetables are perfectly edible, but these are the ONLY "presents" the in-laws EVER bring, to anybody, that is.  If they happen to be out of curled vegetables, they will announce sadly: "What a pity, today we have no vegetables to give away."   The in-laws DO expect everybody else, however, to completely cater to THEIR wishes, no matter what the cost.  I think this behavior is rather repulsive and pitiful, don't you? 1/23         signed - Plenty Of Curled Vegetables To Give Away
	Worst gift: My MIL bought a nice jacket for my husband.  I got a cheap magnet and note pad.  I should thank her for everything, but it was hard for me.  The next year I got a schedule book, but it was last year's one.  I could not use it at all.  My MIL is a most evil person. 1/22         signed - MIL Is A Most Evil Person
	Worst gift: One of the recent posts reminded me of the worst gift I've ever seen a MIL get for her DIL.  I was working for this woman.  She surely must win the prize for one of the worst MIL's ever; much worse than mine.  She was so nasty about her two (lovely) DIL's, and just didn't like ANYONE except her piggish self.  It took me a whole year, at least, to get over the anger and horror of working for her.  But I digress!  Anyway, I took her to a dent and bent grocery store that she liked to go to, where she was looking at these bent-up, old packages of hair dye.  She bought one of these ugly old things to give to her beautiful DIL for Christmas, because she didn't like her DIL's hair and wanted her to dye it another color!!  (ANY color -- whichever color she could get cheap at the dent and bent store!!)  If that isn't an insulting gift, I don't know what is.  And it was given in a disparaging, insulting spirit.  The DIL is so sweet and patient, she might not even have taken offense when she received it.  But, just for the record, the DIL is a very attractive girl who actually looks like Elle MacPherson -- tall and beautiful, with a sweet, pleasant disposition.  The MIL is horrid -- loud, short, FAT (not that I mean to pick on her weight -- it was just that she was so mean).  She looks like a pig, with her turned-up nose and pink skin.  She has an incredibly sly, ugly soul.  I wanted to like her for the longest time, and tried hard to be a friend to her, but grew to loathe her.  She's given a lot of awful presents.  I've been the recipient of a number of them.  She unloads used, worthless junk, or cookies she made hurriedly without bothering to use a recipe (inedible).  But, this has to be the worst one she's given. 1/22         signed - Still Shuddering
	Worst gift: I was just married in October, so this past Christmas was my first Christmas married.  A very special event.  Well, I agreed to go to the in-laws, which was quite a little trip.  About an 8 hour car ride away from my immediate family, which made my mother a little upset .. .but she was ok with it.  Well, to make up for it, once we arrived at my in-law's we found out we had to sleep on the floor, because they didn't arrange anywhere for us to sleep, after my wife had TOLD her parents to buy a mattress for us and they said they did.  And I was presented with one gift on Christmas morning.  A package of underwear.  Now, I'm not talking about a pair of brand name plaid boxers.  I'm talking about a 3 pack of briefs from a department store.  To boot, they were too small, so I can't wear them!  Welcome to the family! 1/19         signed - Buy My Own Underwear RESPONSE:  Buy My Own Underwear You were given only underwear on your first Christmas with them?  That is pretty bad!!!  What were they thinking?  I guess they weren't!!  That gift is horrible!!! 1/21
	Worst gift: Worst gift story ... let me see ... there are so many, maybe I should just list them: - a tissue box cover in the shape of a couch, complete with polyester frilly lace all around the bottom, in which the tissues pop out between the cushions - red, blue and white knitted slippers shaped like high cut basketball shoes - a "kitchen witch", this ugly plastic witch that you hang from your ceiling that is supposed to keep evil cooking spirits out of your kitchen and prevent things from burning/tasting bad - this was just after we had dinner in which we had a cooking disaster (we've all had them), was she trying to tell me something? - countless tacky t-shirts with stiff pictures ironed on them and outlined in this even crustier gold glitter stuff -a Christmas decoration with the previous year's date on it. - reused birthday cards - every year!! - a HUGE picture of herself, I'm talking wall poster size - have you ever seen the movie Throw Mamma From the Train? - well she looks like Mamma. ughhhhhhhh -every Christmas she gives my son a toy intended for a 6 month old baby- he's seven years old,  Oh, I could go on and on and on signature: taking it all with a laugh and a smile 1/18         signed - Taking It All With A Laugh And A Smile RESPONSE:  Taking It All With A Laugh And A Smile The only one of those gifts that sounds good to me is the kitchen witch.  I collect those (do you want to swap it with me for something?).  She does seem to have terrible taste in gifts -- tacky! 1/24 RESPONSE:  Taking It All With A Laugh And A Smile I think that giving you a kitchen witch was not a nice thing to do.  I sympathize because I have been the recipient of many a piece of garbage from the in-laws.  I just wanted to relate a story of my own about the kitchen witch.  When I was in college, I had a roommate who was a lot like most of our MILs.  She never took responsibility for her own actions, she twisted the truth, she blamed all her problems on others (me most of the time ... but, other students, teachers and the system were also to blame).  And when you tried to talk to her, your words fell on deaf ears.  She did her best to find scapegoats and then get others to support and ignore that person.  She succeeded in getting her way a few times, but most people figured her out after some time.  Anyway, since I had no respect for her, (and I now admit that this was totally wrong) I read a letter that she had received from her mother.  ***Let me explain that her mother was the person who aided and abetted her bad habits of not accepting responsibilities.  Her mom encouraged her to constantly blame everyone else, and helped her to think of herself as a victim ***.  In this letter, her mom called me and one of my friends "witches".  Since eavesdroppers never hear any good about themselves, I guess I deserved that.  But, we ended up having a lot of laughs about being called witches.  We exchanged gifts of dishtowels, figurines, etc., with the kitchen witch motif.  So, today when I see a kitchen witch, I actually have good memories of it, (even though the good times came about because of a person who makes my mother-in-law look tame).  I am glad you are laughing about your problem too. 1/24
	Worst gift: My mother-in-law found a bottle of foundation makeup at a drug store going out of business sale ... she paid 50 cents, but later found out they were marked down to 25 cents, so she went back and demanded they refund the difference.  At Christmas, she passed out these bottles of makeup to all the women in the family. 1/19         signed - Pulling My Hair Out ... RESPONSE:  Pulling My Hair Out ... Was this your actual Christmas gift?  If so, then how horrible of her!  If it was just something she thought that you could use, then just blow it off.  Sometimes those mothers in laws do things we think are so dumb, when they really think they are doing a good thing. 1/21
	Worst gift: One of the worst gifts my MIL got me was when I was newly married.  For Christmas, she got us (my husband and I) a large, framed photo of her family (dh, his sisters, MIL, FIL) when they were all younger.  On it she'd had professionally written: "To my son, so he'll always remember his true family.  Love, Mom."  Isn't that a lovely Christmas gift for a new bride and her husband?  We still have the photo - in the bottom of a box in the garage.  The frame is being used for a photo of my husband and I.  Hope she recognizes the frame, that witch! 1/15         signed - "True" Family Love ... NOT! RESPONSE:  "True" Family Love ... NOT! Obviously, your MIL was trying to sabotage your marriage from the beginning.  What a witch! 1/22

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