|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Mother-In-Law Mall
A place to find great gifts!
and products related to mothers-in-law and other family members.
|
|
|
|
|
|
Mother-In-Law Stories
|
Frequent
Fry HerTM
ShksGoddess
Age: 48 MIL Age: 60+
Support Group
|
Frequent
Fry Her TM.
- shksgoddess/Posted: 28-NOV-07
What is it about MILs who can wait for just
the right moment to get their comments in, and you don't have a snappy
comeback? DH and I were visiting the PILs. Everything
was pretty mellow and I was in a good mood (soon to be shattered by
the Great Facilitator, but that's another story). MIL suddenly
turned to my DH and said, "So, have you had your medical tests
done yet?" When DH answered in the negative, she chided
him about getting them done. When I looked at her a little funny
(like, why are YOU getting on his case about his health), she just
shrugged her shoulders and murmured, "Well, it's a mommy's job."
Why oh why didn't I just reply, "No, it's now a WIFE's job?"
Signed - Mommy Has Me Tongue-Tied
( respond to this story )
( here is my story )
( I
want my own Frequent
Fry Her TM
Page )
|
|
Frequent
Fry Her TM.
- shksgoddess/Posted: 28-AUG-07
This story isn't about me, but a friend of mine who had a horrible
MIL. One evening, my friend was visiting with the ILs and left
the room to go and feed her child. Her MIL was in the next room
speaking to her DH, and did not realize that my friend was in the
next room. MIL said, "I need to speak to you and your brother
when your b!tch of a wife isn't around!" My friend heard
every word, and when her MIL walked into the kitchen, she looked up,
saw my friend and turned white. Knowing that her MIL was cheap
and hated to waste anything, my friend walked over to the fridge,
took out a new gallon of orange juice, and loudly exclaimed, "Oh
I'm so thirsty, I just have to have something to drink," without
once breaking eye contact with her MIL. She opened the jug,
took a swig out of it, and proceeded to dump the rest down the kitchen
sink, saying the entire time it took to empty the jug, "Oh MIL,
thank you, I was just so thirsty! All this orange juice tasted
so good!" She then smiled at her MIL and left the empty
jug on the counter. As she picked up her child with her DH in
tow, she turned to her MIL and said, "Oh, and you know that suit
you have that you asked me to alter, I won't be doing that - and I'm
sure you know why." Her MIL didn't dare say one word.
Many, many years later we still laugh about it!
Signed - Now, That's MY
Kind of B!tch!
( respond to this story )
( here is my story )
( I
want my own Frequent
Fry Her TM
Page )
|
|
Frequent
Fry Her TM.
- shksgoddess/Posted: 31-JAN-07
My FIL seems to be in some warped competition with his son, but this
time he fell flat on his face. DH's uncle came in from out of
town and my FIL wanted to take the family (adults, that is) out to
dinner at the same place where my DH had his birthday party a couple
of weeks ago. Now, I don't really care for this place, but DH
and his family love it because they can get the special food they
all love. I'm a good sport and I went along because I really
do like this uncle. My FIL made a big deal about being the host
of the party, which is fine. After all, I didn't want to steal
his thunder. Everyone settled down and ordered dinner.
When it finally came to FIL's turn, he ordered NOTHING. That's
right, he decided not to order a meal because he "just lost a
couple of pounds" and if he ordered a meal, he'd just eat the
whole thing. WTF? How little-girly can you get?
So, OK, the portions can be a bit large and he and MIL were going
to share a meal. Strangely enough, I don't recall hearing him
ASK her if she was OK with this. Not my husband, not my problem.
As luck would have it, the IL's meal shows up and it was not as huge
as they thought it might be. The ILs devoured their meal and
then FIL started in on everyone else's! He picked off my SIL's
and BIL's plates, and was eyeing my DH's for when he finished mopping
up the others'. Talk about bizarre! I guess ordering an
appetizer or something small was too much for him to contemplate.
Every single meal where this man is present turns into an ordeal or
a fight with my DH. He's a bully and enjoys the "taste"
of his foot so much that we are all embarrassed. I dread the
upcoming holidays. You can sign me . . .
Signed - Just An Observer
At The Freak Show
( respond to this story )
( here is my story )
( I
want my own Frequent
Fry Her TM
Page )
|
|
Frequent
Fry Her TM.
- shksgoddess/Posted: 18-DEC-06
The Ring Saga, Part I: When DH was a very
young man, his GM left him a diamond engagement ring with the intent
that he give it to his future bride. Twenty years later he asked
his dad to please take the ring out of the safe deposit box, as he
wanted to present it to me. My FFIL was extremely worried.
After all, what would happen to the ring should we split up (as he
hoped)? When my FDH presented this conundrum to me, I did the
only honorable thing. I wrote a letter to his parents and told
them that the ring would be returned should we ever break up.
I meant every word of it, and still do. They seemed OK with
this, and my FFIL promised to get the ring out of storage soon.
Then the feces hit the oscillating appliance. Out of nowhere
FFIL began to make demands and attach conditions to the ring.
He did not like the classes I was taking with another house of worship,
I must switch to his. My FDH and I must join a house of worship
of their religion. He insisted that I convert before my DH put
a ring on my finger, and so on. To his credit, my DF was pretty
disgusted at this "jump through the flaming hoops game".
When he told me of these new strings, I said "(expletive), I'd
rather have a paper cigar band than that big, honking ring with all
those conditions. Please tell your dad, 'Thanks, but no thanks.'
You can buy me my own ring." My beloved DF said that that
was what he thought I would say, and he agreed with me. By then,
DF was getting pretty sick and tired of his parent's manipulation.
There were many other incidents besides this one. So, the next
day DF and FFIL met at the parking lot at work on the way home (coming
in separate cars), where DF told FFIL, "Thanks, but no thanks."
Here's where it gets stupid: Somehow, because I refused to concede
to all the (religious) conditions, FFIL believed that I had lied to
them and misrepresented myself to them about my absolute commitment
to convert (trace of sarcasm). He immediately raced home in
a lather to inform FMIL of these developing betrayals. Now FMIL
was frothing at the mouth when she heard this. My DH stopped
at their home on the way home and World War III blew up in his face.
They screamed, they yelled, they accused and, for all I know, burned
me in effigy. There was only one good thing about all this:
DF, who had been raised with "honor thy father and mother"
coming first, before "thou shalt not kill", drew the line
in the sand with these unreasonable jerks and backed me 110%!
Round One of this fight went on for HOURS, with my DF leaving in tears
and my FILs feeling utterly betrayed by their former docile and obedient
son. The story doesn't end there. Stay tuned for Part
II of The Ring Saga!
Signed - Who Needs Wagner
When I Have My Own Ring Saga?
( respond to this story )
( here is my story )
( I
want my own Frequent
Fry Her TM
Page )
|
|
Frequent
Fry Her TM.
- shksgoddess/Posted: 18-DEC-06
Part II of the Ring Saga: As I mentioned
in my last post, my FDH and FILs got into a huge fight because of
their own foolish misunderstanding that stemmed from an heirloom engagement
ring that my DH's GM left him. FIL wanted to attach some conditions
to the ring and my DH stood his ground and said, "No thank you."
Prior to the opening salvos of WWIII in the parking lot at work, FMIL
had invited me to a religious observance (which traditionally includes
dinner) at their home, which I gladly accepted. But, once the
missiles began to fly, my FMIL spat out that she was "uninviting"
me to said occasion, saying to FDH that he could tell me that I was
no longer welcome. DF said, "YOU invited her, now YOU can
un-invite her. I'm not doing your petty dirty work!"
After they (AGAIN) presented him with the laundry list of reasons
why he should not marry me, he told them that since they had such
a problem with it, they would not be part of OUR lives anymore.
If I was not invited to dinner, then HE would not attend either.
His mind was made up as to where he really belonged. And furthermore,
he would NEVER again go to their home for a weekly religious dinner
(a really big thing in their family) unless WE went! Wow.
By this time his parents are starting to feel a little foolish.
Not only did their son grow a spine, but that spine was made of steel.
Now, his mother did indeed UN-invite me to dinner that night, but
she made up some lame excuse about how they were going to accept the
invitation to another friend's home. I wisely kept my mouth
shut, played stupid, and FDH and I made plans to continue life without
them. Alas, it was not to be. The Ring Saga continues
with Part III.
Signed - Who needs Wagner
When I Have My Own Ring Saga? Part II
( respond to this story )
( here is my story )
( I
want my own Frequent
Fry Her TM
Page )
|
|
Frequent
Fry Her TM.
- shksgoddess/Posted: 18-DEC-06
The Ring Saga, Part III: Things wore down
from the huge fight that my DF had with his parents about the ring,
conditions, my fitness as a mate, etc. One day at work I received
a mysterious phone call from my FFIL asking me to meet him at a coffee
shop near a movie theater in our neighborhood. He explained
that he told his DW that he was going to see a movie, but instead
snuck out to meet me. "Don't tell my DS," he said.
I immediately contacted my DF and told him of this clandestine meeting.
DF wasn't surprised, but cautioned me and asked me to tell him everything
his DF said to me. When FFIL (who shall hereby be known as "The
Great Facilitator") and I met that evening, he begged me to make
a meaningless conversion to his religion to "save his marriage".
WTF??! He said that the fact that their DS had chosen someone
not of their religion was the worst thing that could happen to his
DW. And how on earth could they hold their heads up in front
of their friends? I didn't hesitate. I said, "Sir,
you are asking me to make a meaningless conversion, and by that you
are asking me to commit an act of dishonor. I will NOT stand
before your god with a lie on my lips. I may not be drop-dead
gorgeous, but I am a person of great integrity and it is your blindness
that cannot see or appreciate it. I would do such a thing ONLY
when there is a rip in the fabric of space and time. If your
marriage hinges on my conversion to your religion, then I would say
that you have much bigger problems than a DIL of another faith!"
He nodded sadly, then told me how disappointed and surprised he was
to hear that I was not immediately going to run out and change my
religion. And the ring? A year later my FDH and I were
literally on our way out the door (we had since moved in together)
to choose an engagement ring when his cell phone went off. It
was his dad, who told us that as soon as the engagement ring could
be appraised and insured, my DF could have it to give to me.
We looked at each other and said, in unison, "Only Dad."
By now, I hated the ring, sight unseen. After all this drama
I thought that it was probably huge and clunky and ugly. So,
almost exactly one year after the huge fight, I came home from work
and my beloved got down on BOTH knees and asked me to be his wife.
I took one look at the ring and fell in love with it. It fit
on my finger like it was made for me, and today it sits on my left
ring finger next to my wedding band. And, although my ILs have
said many hurtful things and caused me much stress up to the wedding
and beyond, my DH and I have our revenge by living well and being
very happy. The moral of the story is that if you want your
son to still be in your life, DO NOT honk off the FDIL! For
if you do, you will sit around your house and be lonely - like my
ILs. Now, all joking aside, I know darn well how very lucky
I am that my DH grew a set and stood up for me. I know that
many of you here are not so lucky. Counseling worked for us
and I hope that each of you finds something that does for you.
I am so happy I found this site. You all have been an inspiration
and have given great advice and support. Bright blessings!
Signed - Who needs Wagner
When I Have My Own Ring Saga? Part III
( respond to this story )
( here is my story )
( I
want my own Frequent
Fry Her TM
Page )
|
|
Frequent
Fry Her TM.
- shksgoddess/Posted: 14-DEC-06
Worst gift: The worst
gift I ever received was a snow globe from my stepmother. I
was a little surprised because normally she gives me some great gifts.
That year I had just split up from my DH and had just moved into my
own apartment. There were so many other things that I would
have liked, but apparently she felt the snow globe was just the thing
I needed. The story has a happy ending for the snow globe.
It had sat up in my closet for about five years when my oldest DD
saw it and squealed, "Oh mom, I just LOVE snow globes!"
I couldn't give it to her fast enough. So now my unwanted gift
has a new home. My DD has her new snow globe and I have a funny
story!
Signed - Glad It Worked
Out OK
( respond to this story )
( I can top this )
( I
want my own Frequent
Fry Her TM
Page )
|
|
Frequent
Fry Her TM.
- shksgoddess, 1 of 4 needed/Posted:
28-OCT-06
My MIL is very passive-aggressive. When she was my FMIL, she
trotted out an entire laundry list of reasons why FDH should not marry
me. The biggest reason was that I did not share the same religion
that she did, and that her grandchildren by me would not "technically"
be of the same faith (therefore, unacceptable). This, of course,
after she and FFIL sat me down without FDH around to explain why I
should not have children by their son. As our wedding approached,
she kept waffling back and forth on whether or not she would even
attend the wedding, as she felt that any wedding by an interfaith
couple would be a "travesty" and a "mockery."
We even saw a therapist over this, and thank goodness FDH saw through
the game and refused to kowtow to her little tantrums. My FBIL
proposed to his GF the same weekend that FDH proposed to me.
Because the GF was of the same faith as the ILs, she became the darling
of the family. Needless to say, I freaked when I heard, and
was more than a little upset when they set their date before ours.
But, I'm a good sport and couldn't do anything about it anyway, so
I just smiled and sucked it up. Most of the FIL's friends did
not know that FDH and I were engaged! When their friends found
out and tried to congratulate the FILs, they brushed them away as
if they had suggested something unpleasant. But, of course,
they were delighted to be congratulated on their other son's upcoming
wedding. At my FBIL and FSIL's wedding, I was totally ignored
by MIL. I am not included in any of the family photos, even
though my own wedding to their son was only a few weeks away.
None of my FILs lifted one finger to help us with our wedding.
We were smart enough to pay for everything ourselves so they could
not control how we did things. On the night before the wedding
(at the rehearsal dinner) my FMIL confided to my FFIL the following,
"I am totally against this marriage and this wedding, but since
it's going to go off with or without my approval, I guess I'll learn
to love her after the wedding." Naturally, my idiot of
a FFIL had to come running to tell me this, thinking that I would
be grateful for these crumbs of affection. NOT! On the
day of the wedding, my FMIL refused to wear the corsage that I had
bought for her to wear, sat in the back of the ceremony room and pouted.
I never heard one word of congratulations, good luck, or even, "go
to hades," from them. Since then, my MIL has tried to be
nice and is not quite so standoffish, but I think it's mainly due
to my FIL's bullying and manipulation. My FIL tries way too
hard to promise material things to buy my affection, but the thought
of accepting these outlandish things makes me want to hurl.
I can never trust them not to stab me in the back when I turn around.
They still try to manipulate their son into being their unpaid handyman.
Thank goodness DH is learning to say no.
Signed - I Have A Long
Memory
( respond to this story )
( here is my story )
( I
want my own Frequent
Fry Her TM
Page )
|
|
Frequent
Fry Her TM.
- shksgoddess, 2 of 4 needed/Posted:
12-NOV-06
When my ex-DH told his DM that he wanted to
introduce me to her, she looked at him and said, "Why?"
Fast forward to a couple of weeks later. When I met her and
FIL, she smiled, called me by his first wife's name, and asked if
I would like tea or something. I said, "No thank you, and
most people call me [my real name]. To her credit she appeared
to be embarrassed by her slip, or so I thought a the time. It
was an accurate indicator of the rest of our relationship.
Signed - Wrong Wife, Silly!
( respond to this story )
( here is my story )
( I
want my own Frequent
Fry Her TM
Page )
|
|
Frequent
Fry Her TM.
- shksgoddess, 3 of 4 needed/Posted:
14-NOV-06
The following Mother's Day after my Ex-DH and
I moved in together, we were invited to a Mother's Day Brunch with
her, FIL, BIL and his new DW. There was one catch; I had to
leave my two little ones from a previous marriage at home! When
my ex-DH pointed out the irony of this whole invitation, my ex-MIL
started whining and said, "But why not? She sees her kids
every other day of the year!" What she had conveniently
forgotten was that I was working full time and going to school part-time
at night. But even if I was lucky enough to be a SAHM, the audacity
to ask me to leave my kids home on Mother's Day! What a selfish,
self-centered witch!
Signed - You Take Your
Kids And I'll Take Mine!
( respond to this story )
( here is my story )
( I
want my own Frequent
Fry Her TM
Page )
|
|
Frequent
Fry Her TM.
- shksgoddess, 4 of 4 needed/Posted:
24-NOV-06
Warning, this is not your typical terrible MIL
story. For most of my marriage to my ex-DH, my ex-MIL made my
life miserable. She was rude and condescending. She said
lousy things about me when she thought that I couldn't hear or wasn't
present, and made those stupid kissy noises next to my ear when we
had to show up to her always immaculate townhouse. I always
thought that I would dance on her grave singing, "Ding, Dong,
the witch is dead," when she (thankfully) passed. Funny
how plans go astray. Ex-MIL developed senile dementia and it
affected her memory. In short, she forgot that she hated me
and loved talking to me when I visited her in the hospital.
She told me stories about how she and her deceased husband met and
how she had given birth to her first child at the end of WWII while
her army doctor husband was away overseas. We actually sat and
watched a holiday movie together. After that, I realized a few
things: 1) It's hard to keep hating someone who doesn't
remember hurting you. 2) Once she stopped seeing me as
the evil DIL she could actually be nice. 3) Maybe the
problems weren't so much hers, but my perceptions that were exacerbated
by her son! There is no real "happy" ending to this
story, as I left her DS about 5 years ago, and as far as I know, she
is still in a nursing home far away. I wouldn't dream of suggesting
for all of you to be patient and wait for your MIL to see the light.
It probably won't happen. But, whether or not we realize it,
we are in a triangle with MIL, DH and ourselves, and each of us affects
the relationship in some way. Now I'm remarried and have a whole
new set of toxic in-laws, but that is another story.
Signed - A Little Older
and Wiser
( respond to this story )
( here is my story )
( I
want my own Frequent
Fry Her TM
Page )
|
|
|
|