To Help The Red Cross Click Here
Mother-In-Law Mall
A place to find great gifts!
and products related to mothers-in-law and other family members.

 
mother-in-law stories bd10358.gif
Back To Mother-In-Law Stories Home Page
Mother-In-Law Stories
Frequent Fry HerTM
mother-in-law stories bd10358.gif
London Calling
Age: 40    MIL Age: 64

frequent fry her - LondonCalling Frequent Fry Her TM. - LondonCalling/Posted: 20-JAN-08
Worst gift:  The PILs brought my kids a gift back from their recent holiday.  It was three "twigs" that are actually colored pencils.  They look like twigs.  They don't have the uniform shape of a normal pencil, and they don't fit inside a normal pencil sharpener.  If they need sharpening, and they arrived in such a state that they do, then they need to be whittled with a knife.  One is yellow, one is orange, and one is green.

        Signed - Just What The Kids Always Wanted (Not)
        ( respond to this story )        ( I can top this )

( I want my own Frequent Fry Her TM Page )

frequent fry her - LondonCalling Frequent Fry Her TM. - LondonCalling/Posted: 2-JAN-07
Two days ago FIL told us that he and MIL had gotten us a gift!!!!  Wow, were we surprised.  A spontaneous gift has never happened in all our 18 years of marriage.  They handed DH an envelope and inside was a dvd.  About Global Warming.  Well, we looked at it, and looked at each other.  We thought, "Ok, not really what we were expecting.  But it is a serious issue, so we will watch it."  We thanked them graciously, as they expected, and thought nothing more of it.  I mentioned it this morning to a friend, and she said that her parents had a copy of the same dvd - because it came free with a magazine.  Well, now it all makes sense.  It didn't cost them anything and they didn't want it, so they gave it to us.  Gee, thanks.  It never ceases to amaze me how they have enough money to travel back and forth to their holiday apartment at least twice a year, plus they had another holiday abroad as well last year.  They go to the theater, shows, exhibitions, etc., all the time, and they hate to spend any money on their kids and grandchildren.  If it was a freebie, why not just admit it and give it to us like normal people.  Why did we have to go through this dramatic and bountiful presentation? They leave me . . .

        Signed - Speechless
        ( respond to this story )        ( here is my story )

( I want my own Frequent Fry Her TM Page )

frequent fry her - LondonCalling Frequent Fry Her TM. - LondonCalling/Posted: 21-DEC-06
In 6 weeks time we will be celebrating our eldest son's bar mitzvah, something that we have been looking forward to since he was born.  And yet, I am approaching the day with mixed feelings.  I am very sad that none of my immediate family will be there - both parents and my only sister have all passed away.  But what I am dreading the most is what my MIL has up her sleeve for the big day.  This woman has to be in the limelight, and she just cannot, or will not allow someone else to have it.  She will try and portray herself as the loving grandmother in front of all our guests, which is just not true at all.  And nobody knows it more than all 3 of my sons, who are used to being largely ignored by her.  I know that she is going to try and boss me around in front of my guests, which is going to drive me crazy.  To top it all off, FIL has been very ill recently, and she is busy letting everybody know it, and playing the stoic martyr.  As the day draws closer, I am getting really jittery, and would really appreciate any advice on how to handle the MIL monster on the day so it isn't ruined for DS, DH, our other DSs and me.

        Signed - How To Handle The MIL Monster
        ( respond to this story )        ( here is my story )

( I want my own Frequent Fry Her TM Page )

frequent fry her - LondonCalling Frequent Fry Her TM. - LondonCalling/Posted: 8-DEC-06
It never ceases to amaze me how self-absorbed my MIL is.  It is like she just cannot comprehend other people having lives, and certainly they don't have significant events in their lives, like she does.  A prime example happened this week.  There was a tornado in a nearby area, which caused major damage to homes and injured a number of people.  MIL had to take FIL for an outpatient appointment that afternoon, and she has been telling everyone that she was caught in the tornado.  Well, the tornado actually happened a couple of miles away from where she was, and it happened in the morning, nearly 3 hours before she drove near there.  So, she was actually several miles away from it, and in no danger whatsoever.  She told us about her ordeal and about the tornado this morning (as if we couldn't possibly have known about it, even though it was on every news bulletin and in every newspaper in the country, and EVERYBODY over here knows about it).  What did she think, it was only on HER radio and TV?

        Signed - What Planet Is She On?
        ( respond to this story )        ( here is my story )

( I want my own Frequent Fry Her TM Page )

frequent fry her - LondonCalling Frequent Fry Her TM. - LondonCalling/Posted: 11-NOV-06
For a little while there I felt sorry for MIL.  FIL was diagnosed with cancer, and we were warned to expect the worst.  Luckily, they caught it early.  FIL underwent major surgery 2 weeks ago, and they think they got it all.  For a little while MIL became human.  She was very frightened about what was happening, and I actually thought that I must have misjudged the woman, that she really wasn't so bad after all.  Well, all good things come to an end.  Now that she knows that FIL is out of danger, she is slipping back into her old self.  She is really enjoying the attention that FIL's illness has brought, and she has cast herself as "best actress in a starring role" and "director of the melodrama".  Gone is the scared woman of 2 weeks ago - the b!tch is back!  She controls everything, and everything revolves around her.  FIL is coming home tomorrow, and he must be bracing himself for being put into the clutches of chief gaoler.  I am wondering what is in store for all of us.  There is bound to be a strict rota for visiting, shopping, etc., that we all have to abide by.  Not only that, but she used to make FIL do all the "heavy" housework for her (she won't lift anything heavier than a teacup or a knife and fork), so who is going to do that for her now that he is incapacitated?

        Signed - Who Is Going To Do That For Her Now?
        ( respond to this story )        ( here is my story )

( I want my own Frequent Fry Her TM Page )

frequent fry her - LondonCalling Frequent Fry Her TM. - LondonCalling/Posted: 3-OCT-06
FIL has had digestion problems for some time.  Recently, things have gotten worse, to the point that his liver has become affected, his eyes show jaundice, and a stent has been put in.  He looks very gaunt and unwell.  MIL has become his guard, watching everything he eats, and fussing.  She can't bear not to be in the limelight somehow - a sick husband, a grandchild with a birthday, whatever.  There are grave concerns over his health.  MIL is diabolical now.  When FIL is no longer around to act as a buffer, she is only going to be worse. We are . . .

        Signed - Afraid, Very Afraid
        ( respond to this story )        ( here is my story )

( I want my own Frequent Fry Her TM Page )

frequent fry her - LondonCalling Frequent Fry Her TM. - LondonCalling/Posted: 26-SEP-06
A few months ago DH received an unexpected bonus at work.  He suggested that after 18 years and 3 kids together, it was time to buy me an eternity ring.  We went out for lunch together one day and chose the ring, and were both very happy.  MIL and FIL were at the apartment overseas and knew nothing about it.  Scroll forward 3 months and the outlaws came to dinner last night.  The subject of my ring came up.  MIL actually said that she had noticed it on my finger, but didn't mention it because she didn't think that it was real (real diamonds)!!!!  How rude is that?  I told her that it was real, thank you very much, and she took it to try it on.  She only managed to get it on her pinkie.  Then she handed it back and managed to bite out that she wished me well to wear it.  MIL and FIL have been married for 44 years and FIL has never bought her an eternity ring.  I guess he is in the doghouse now!!

        Signed - Eternity Ring
        ( respond to this story )        ( here is my story )

( I want my own Frequent Fry Her TM Page )

frequent fry her - LondonCalling Frequent Fry Her TM. - LondonCalling/Posted: 23-SEP-06
I think that my MIL has Munchausen's Syndrome, maybe even by Proxy.  FIL has had stomach problems for a long time, and suffers acutely from acid reflux.  Twice so far this year he has been so unwell that he has been admitted to a hospital, and coincidentally (?) these trips to hospital have coincided with the only 2 occasions this year when he and MIL have been looking after our kids.  Hmm.  I can't help wondering if his illness is related to MIL's cooking, which is atrocious, very plain and always overcooked.  We used to go there for dinner once a week until our first child was born, 12 years ago.  I used to find her cooking indigestible while I was pregnant, and we used to part company either on the way home or as soon as DH and I got home.  Luckily, these days I am mostly spared her cooking (she claims that cooking for more than 2 people is "too much" for her these days (she is only 64).  Soon after my mom passed away in the spring we were invited for dinner.  The chicken was so dry that I had to stop myself from saying, "Honey, when you buy the chicken, it is already dead; you can't kill it again no matter how hard you try."  But good manners prevailed.  Everything was overcooked.  I should have expected that when the peas were already in the pan boiling away on the stove when we arrived, but we didn't eat for another half an hour.  I was awake most of the night with terrible indigestion.  FIL has been married to her for 43 years, you'd think he would be immune by now.

        Signed - Indigestion
        ( respond to this story )        ( here is my story )

( I want my own Frequent Fry Her TM Page )

frequent fry her - LondonCalling Frequent Fry Her TM. - LondonCalling/Posted: 13-SEP-06
Every Christmas time, when we are summonsed to MIL's, she likes to play Lady Bountiful, and we are expected to show our deepest gratitude.  She dishes out presents to her GC which demonstrate that she really doesn't know them very well at all.  She gives extra ones to her favorites for things like "being the oldest", which is very unfair to the younger ones, and boy have they noticed!  Last year was no different.  She gave beloved GD 2 extra presents.  One was a tapestry that she had made that she expects GD to hang in her new bedroom (which hasn't even been built yet), and one extra present for being the eldest.  As GD is only a couple of weeks older than my DS, MIL gave him the same extra present, which was for a GIRL!  Funnily enough, DS had no use for it, so favorite GD got that one as well.  For once DH actually spoke up.  He agreed that a gift like the tapestry should have been given in private, and not in front of other children who weren't going to receive anything.  He said that giving extra gifts to certain children is very divisive and unfair.  MIL also gives a token gift to her DDs, and sometimes she will include me.  Last year she gave us these useless little note cards, too big to be table place cards and too small to be anything else.  But she never buys DH anything.  We have been married for 18 years and I have never seen her give him anything (nor has she given to either of her DD's DHs).  I know that she doesn't like either of her SILs much (and she sure doesn't like me).  But her DS is very loyal and bends over backwards for her, so . . .

        Signed - Why Does She Continually Ignore Him Like This?
        ( respond to this story )        ( here is my story )

( I want my own Frequent Fry Her TM Page )

frequent fry her - LondonCalling Frequent Fry Her TM. - LondonCalling/Posted: 7-AUG-06
Most summers MIL takes the 4 eldest grandkids on an outing, usually to a show at an open air theater in a park.  This trip includes my eldest and middle DSs, but not the youngest, as he is deemed forever "too young", as are all the other grandkids.  But MIL thinks that both her DDs and DIL can bring the other kids along, too, and we can sit outside the theater and wait for them!  I have absolutely refused to do that part in the past, as I have better things to do.  And I will not allow her to control me like that.  Anyway, this year we are due to go on holiday, while SIL and family are not going away, as they have had a large extension built on their house and can't afford to go away this year.  So what has MIL done?  She has booked tickets for herself, FIL, SIL and SIL's kids to go to the show on the day that we were due to go away.  This was something that I half expected her to do, but I did not expect her to be so brazen as to come out and tell me about it (and to do so in front of my kids).  It so happens that we are not going away that day now because of the problems in the Middle East.  We have had to change our holiday plans, and are going somewhere else 2 days later.  I don't begrudge SIL and her kids having an outing if they aren't going away, but what I do mind is the fact that she has deliberately left my kids out, and will not make time to spend with them at a later date instead.  But, there are never any other outings than this; it's the only one she ever does.  When she realized that we would actually still be here when the outing is due to take place, MIL said, "If my DSs want to come with, I will TRY to see if I can TRY to get a couple more tickets, if there are any left.  But there probably won't be."  Does she really think I am that stupid that I can't see what she is doing?  Once again, she is playing favorites with her grandkids at my kids' expense.  Kids are not stupid.  They can see the games that she is playing.!  Why would she think that they would even want to go under these circumstances, when she has made them feel like the afterthoughts, yet again?  In the past MIL has orchestrated outings to coordinate with SIL's holiday plans, but conflict with ours.  So, ...

        Signed - Once Again Our Kids Miss Out, But SIL's Never Do
        ( respond to this story )        ( here is my story )

( I want my own Frequent Fry Her TM Page )

frequent fry her - LondonCalling Frequent Fry Her TM. - LondonCalling/Posted: 25-JUL-06
I have a strong feeling that my MIL is trying to pick a fight with me, or rather that she is trying to goad me into having a fight with her.  In public she is perfectly ok with me, but if it is just her and me together, or over the phone, she is kind of nasty, almost like she is trying to see how far she can go.  I am almost sure that if I confronted her or got my DH to confront her, she would deny everything, so I have to be careful how I handle her until she drops herself right in it.  She has fooled a lot of people into thinking that she is a nice person, but those of us who married her 4 kids can tell a different story, as can our own kids, who basically hate her.  When she spends time with my kids without us, which rarely happens, instead of being the loving grandma, she is very bossy and controlling, and they have to do what she wants.  Invariably, the kids come home miserable, and I have gradually pieced together what she does to them.  It doesn't usually get physical, although she did slap her GD's (my niece) face once, and her parents went ballistic.  Usually, it is just what she says to them, controlling them, taunting them, bullying them, almost like she resents them being at her house, when she invited them in the first place.  It is hard to get my DH to see that it is wrong, when he and his siblings grew up with her acting like that.  Well, I didn't grow up with a mother like that, and having to endure this horrible woman is too much for me sometimes, so it must be a nightmare for my kids.  My eldest son said to me last week that he watches movies or TV programs where kids say, "I love you grandma," and he has no idea what that means or how that feels.  I told him that he shouldn't worry about it - he has 2 loving parents, brothers and cousins and friends, and they are all that he needs.  She is his only grandma, and this is how he feels - sad, huh?  When my mom passed away 4 months ago, my kids burst into tears and said that the wrong grandma had gone!

        Signed - MIL Is Trying To Pick A Fight With Me
        ( respond to this story )        ( here is my story )

( I want my own Frequent Fry Her TM Page )

frequent fry her - LondonCalling Frequent Fry Her TM. - LondonCalling/Posted: 22-JUL-06
MIL and FIL came back from their holiday apartment overseas this week, where they have been for the last 7 weeks.  DH has kept an eye on their house while they were away, watered plants, dealt with correspondence, etc., and ran like the obedient puppy dog that he is to fetch them from the airport.  For his trouble, MIL actually gave him a present (the first time ever) - a lousy bottle of chocolate liqueur.  She knows that DH likes scotch, but she wasn't that grateful to splurge on a bottle of that in Duty Free.  She opted for the cheapest thing that she could find.  How nice of her to make her son feel appreciated, as usual.  MIL doesn't bother to hide the fact that she prefers girls, daughters and granddaughters.  We only have sons, and they are such an afterthought that she cannot keep them straight in her mind.  Last week, my youngest was sick.  This week the other 2 have been sick, and the youngest had his kindergarten graduation.  MIL just doesn't have a clue who is sick and who was in a show, because she just doesn't care about them.  When she is with them, she makes a big fuss of them for 5 minutes.  Then she gets bored, and they get bored when she starts her "All About Me" stories (what she has been doing since we last saw her).  I have done my best to stay polite to her, but irritation with her behavior is getting harder and harder to hide.  I stay away as much as possible and my DH is finally beginning to understand why.

        Signed - Getting Harder And Harder To Hide
        ( respond to this story )        ( here is my story )

( I want my own Frequent Fry Her TM Page )

frequent fry her - LondonCalling Frequent Fry Her TM. - LondonCalling/Posted: 21-JUL-06
When my eldest DS was due to start school, I asked my MIL if she would help me out by looking after my younger DS for an hour, just so I could concentrate on his brother on his big day.  At that time, younger DS was newly potty trained and was basically a human ticking time bomb!  MIL said, "No," as on Tuesday mornings they go walking with a group.  I gave her weeks of notice, but that was her unshakable reply.  I left it and asked again closer to the date, but again she would not budge.  Now I know for a fact that this walking group is flexible, so why couldn't she be?  I was only asking for an hour of her time; with notice.  Couldn't the group just meet a little later on that day?  She was just so inflexible.  Then she had the cheek to mention it to me on the phone, and I just saw red.  I shouted at her and ended up slamming the phone down.  I rang my DH straight-away and told him.  She then called him and complained that I never phone to see how she is!  That's what this was all about?  In the end, the martyr didn't go walking that day, but came with very bad grace and looked after the time bomb, DS, for that little bit of time required.  Then she flounced out.  She could have easily still gone walking with her DH and their friends, but she chose not to.

        Signed - She Flounced Out
        ( respond to this story )        ( here is my story )

( I want my own Frequent Fry Her TM Page )

frequent fry her - LondonCalling, 1 of 4 needed Frequent Fry Her TM. - LondonCalling, 1 of 4 needed/Posted: 8-JUN-06
MIL gets very jealous if we are invited somewhere and she isn't included.  A few months ago my niece turned 12 and we went to a party in her honor, but MIL and FIL were not invited.  To make her point, she called me to get the birthday girl's address details so that she could send a card.  I know how her mind works, and I just innocently passed on the information.  This morning she called me.  Somebody we know is making a party for their son this weekend and we are invited, but guess who isn't?  We know the family well, and we have kids the same age, so it is kind of natural that we would be invited.  But there is no connection really with the outlaws, so they weren't invited.  MIL started asking for the boy's name (she doesn't even know his name!), and wanted to know what kind of party it is.  Then she said that she wouldn't be able to baby-sit for us (I never asked her to), as she has something else going on.  Then she mentioned that somebody else she knows who made a party a few years ago and invited her to that one.  And I just innocently went along with it all, because it is as plain as the nose on your face that she is jealous and mad as he!! that she isn't on the guest list.  She just can't bear not to be the center of attention at all times; everything is about her.  She can't even start a sentence without "I", so this is agony for her.  Good.

        Signed - This Is Agony For Her
        ( respond to this story )        ( here is my story )

( I want my own Frequent Fry Her TM Page )

frequent fry her - LondonCalling, 1 of 4 needed Frequent Fry Her TM. - LondonCalling, 2 of 4 needed/Posted: 27-JUN-06
Over the last couple of years, whenever somebody has gotten something new (either to wear or for their home), my MIL has adopted a saying , "Wish you well to wear it," or, "Wish you well to use it."  I have heard people use that expression before, but from her it sounds so affected and insincere, basically because I know what a jealous person she really is.  She trots it out because she thinks that it makes her seem "nice".  It just makes me cringe.

        Signed - London Calling
        ( respond to this story )        ( here is my story )

( I want my own Frequent Fry Her TM Page )

frequent fry her - LondonCalling, 1 of 4 needed Frequent Fry Her TM. - LondonCalling, 3 of 4 needed/Posted: 7-JUL-06
SIL and I were pregnant together with our first babies, who were born 3 weeks apart.  MIL bought a family newborn crib, which SIL got to use first because her baby was born first.  I really didn't care, which irked MIL.  I think that she wanted me to throw a strop about it.  Move forward 2 years and SIL has another baby.  The crib was finished with just in time for my 2nd baby.  This time I used it, and got my DH to give it straight back.  Move forward 3 more years and SIL was pregnant again.  But nobody could find the crib.  MIL was so frustrated that she confronted us, and we said that we didn't have it.  When my DH was out of the room, she actually called me a liar and a thief.  I was very upset and started doubting myself.  Maybe we did still have it in our attic, out of the way and forgotten?  We went home and checked, but no, it wasn't there.  SIL's DH was very rude.  He presumed that because they got to use it for both of their other kids, it was theirs.  MIL was also very annoyed and went out to buy a brand new crib for SIL.  Two weeks later FIL found the crib - in their attic.  Cue embarrassed laughter, but absolutely no apology whatsoever from either MIL, FIL, SIL or BIL.  By now I was furious.  We were due to go to MIL's for lunch and I didn't trust myself to speak.  An argument erupted and I was the bad guy because I shouted back at SIL when she shouted at me.  I was told, "SHE IS PREGNANT!  HOW DARE YOU SHOUT AT HER!"  BIL and I didn't speak for 2 years, not even when my sister passed away suddenly.  He couldn't bring himself to say that he was sorry.  It was only when I had my last baby that he actually said anything to me, and no, I didn't use the damn crib!  He thought (wrongly) that I was jealous of them having another child.  Sure, I had had a miscarriage after my 2nd child, but I went on to have another healthy child after my sister passed away.  Suddenly I found myself an only child, and this was the only way I could see through my grief.  Basically, SIL and BIL live on another planet as far as I am concerned.  They have never known real hardship and never experienced the loss of a beloved relative or friend.  Whereas I have lost both parents and my only sibling, which certainly changes your perspective.  I recently heard that SIL has been talking to a friend of hers about the crib incident, and this friend works with a good friend of mine.  SIL is bemoaning the fact that since then she and I haven't been close, and she just can't understand why!!!

        Signed - She Just Can't Understand Why!!!
        ( respond to this story )        ( here is my story )

( I want my own Frequent Fry Her TM Page )

frequent fry her - LondonCalling, 4 of 4 needed Frequent Fry Her TM. - LondonCalling, 4 of 4 needed/Posted: 14-JUL-06
MIL and FIL have bought themselves a holiday apartment overseas, close to where their younger son lives with his wife and family.  They go there for nearly 2 months, twice a year, and I love it when they are gone.  We can get on with our lives in peace.  Well, almost.  Somebody has to keep an eye on their house here, and because we live the closest, it is assumed that it is our responsibility.  My DH has to go twice a week and deal with their correspondence, water plants, etc.  His sisters do nothing.  This time it has been less than peaceful.  MIL is lonely over there and keeps calling, demanding this and that, and she is driving me crazy.  The latest notion is that she wants a lesson in needlework because she is stuck.  Hello?  I am 3,000 miles away!  She may have time to sit and stitch, but I have a young family to take care of, and I don't have time to try and explain something that she won't be able to follow (she is not the brightest crayon in the box).  They are coming back in just over 2 weeks, so why can't it wait until then?  She keeps calling at really awkward times, like mealtimes or when the kids are doing homework and need my attention, and she just drones on and on.  She loves the sound of her own voice; and why say something once when you can say it fourteen times?  I am dreading their return.  I feel myself going into a deep depression at the prospect.  She presumes that we will all be so happy to see her, when the truth is that her kids' partners and most of her grandkids don't like her for her controlling and domineering ways.  This year she has commanded that we all convene at a local park for a family picnic when she returns.  Last time, she commanded that the kids put on a show for her, and they all meekly complied - except me.  I wouldn't do it.

        Signed - I Just Hate Her!
        ( respond to this story )        ( here is my story )

( I want my own Frequent Fry Her TM Page )

 


The Sister Knot, Apter
The Sister Knot
Why We Fight, Why We're Jealous, and Why We'll Love Each Other No Matter What


Secret Paths: Women in the New Midlife
Secret Paths
Women in the New Midlife


Working Women Don't Have Wives, Dr. Terri Apter Working Women Don't Have Wives
Professional Success in the 1990'S


To See More Books By
Dr. Terri Apter
Click Here.


           Back To The Top - Click Here

Search this site or the web powered by FreeFind
    

Site search Web search


DISCLAIMER: 
All advice on this website is for informational and entertainment purposes only.  All responses are from reader submissions unless specifically noted otherwise (such as Dr. Terri Apter advice page).  We do not endorse any of the advice.  We provide it to you as a service.  We can neither guarantee the soundness of the advice, nor make any claims as to the outcome of following this advice.  We provide it for your entertainment only.  Should you choose to follow any of the advice, it is solely at your own risk.  This is not intended to substitute for obtaining advice from appropriate sources and/or professional counseling.  We recommend you consult an appropriate professional, counselor, and/or a trusted advisor before taking any action based on this advice.  B A Squared, LLC and www.motherinlawstories.com make no representations or guarantees regarding any information dispensed on this site.

Your privacy is important to us.  Click here to view our Privacy Policy.

Copyright 1999 - 2011, B A Squared, LLC.  All rights reserved.  Reproduction in whole or in part in any form or medium without express written permission of B A Squared, LLC is strictly prohibited.  All materials submitted (written or otherwise) to www.motherinlawstories.com become the property of B A Squared, LLC.  Submission of any material (written or otherwise) constitutes your permission for B A Squared, LLC to use, edit, reproduce and publish this material (in whole or in part) in any way it deems appropriate, and releases B A Squared, LLC from any and all liability associated with the publication of said material.

CONTACT US: To contact us for any reason, please use the email form on our Help Page which you can get to by clicking here, or email us at webmaster@motherinlawstories.com.